UPDATE on Cozmo....

OMGosh.......I am SO sorry.  Bless your heart.  There are no words...We had to put one of ours down a couple of months ago.  She was not even a horse I had much to do with and I thought I'd never get over it.  I cried for days.  I wish I knew your first name...but God bless you Cozmo.  My heart goes out to you and I cannot imagine the overwhelming loss you now feel.  Just please know, we care.  You are not alone.  I just wish I could hug you.

I am so sorry....there is nothing any of us can say or do to lessen your pain....my heart breaks for you.  I've lost dogs and cats....but there is just something about losing a horse that pierces your very soul.  May God put His healing hands upon your breaking heart........

My name is Carie. Thank you for the kind words. I think I am still in total shock over what happened today. Thinking for almost a month that he would get better and then BOOM, its over in a flash! So hard to deal with, and so very painful to think about. I do believe my other gelding is even greeving. He saw Cozmo be put down and loaded into my vets stock trailer. The most painful thing ever is watching the light fade from his beautiful eyes. Sorry to discribe it but that is all I keep picturing in my head over and over again. This is not the first horse in my life we had to put down, but by far the best horse that did NOT deserve what happened to him. Even with family and friends around, I feel so alone. Please pray for Cozmo, pray that he has reached heaven and God is taken care of him up there! He deserves only the best and I know he is in the best of hands! It still feels like a dream...

Carie....I remember that same thing.  My husband put Cheyenne in the trailer and then the vet administered the drug.  I'd never seen this done before.  When I heard her go down inside the trailer I thought I felt my heart just burst inside my chest.  After it was over, I looked in and looked at her lifeless eyes and knew, she wasn't "there" anymore.  Cheyenne was a beautiful horse and only 3 years old.  Her owner took a 2x4 to her when she was only 5 months old...her mind had been wrecked.  But a friend of my husband's took her home with him and tried to work with her.  He couldn't get her to come around so he brought her to my husband.  My husband told me that Cheyenne really brought him down to earth because he's worked with troubled horses for 40 years and she was the first one that taught him, there are those horses that some human screwed them up so bad that they just can't "come back" no matter how much they might want to.  Cheyenne's responses were always "over the top".  One night she got into a fight with a fence....and lost.  I'd give anything to "know" what happened.  My only guess is something "spooked" her and she met with the fence.  We had gotten into the truck to go feed and my husband looked down there and said, "Uh-oh, I see somebody holdin' a foot in the air".  We got down there and saw she had part of the fence sticking out from the right side of her chest/shoulder.  My husband handed the lead rope to me while he went to call the vet.  She stood quietly but in obvious pain.  She kept acting like she wanted to lay down but she couldn't.  I stood there looking into her eyes crying, knowing she had to be exhausted from standing.  Our other horses up at the main barn all started whinnying.  She answered them back one last time...and THAT just ripped from me whatever level of composure I might have had. The vet arrived and at first he thought it was superficial as you could see a sliver of the board laying just beneath the skin over her shoulder/blade/joint.  As he excised the skin and removed the sliver of board, he pulled the other piece out too...and then I heard it.  It was an all too familiar sound I've heard many times since working in the operating room for 25 years.  It was the sound of a lung collapsing.  I guess when she hit that board it hit the shoulder joint and split into two pieces.  One piece went to the outside and the other went into her lung.  My husband had backed the trailer down to where she was standing.  And as much pain as I know she had to be in, she complied with my husbands wishes one last time and stepped into the trailer.  There is not a doubt in my mind, she would not have gone into that trailer for anyone but my husband.  I have a piece of her tail I keep on my desk that I intend to do "something" with.  She had been a troubled horse most of her short life.  But she lived well here with us for the last two.
Rest assured, Carie...Cozmo has wings now.  The Lord loves horses...they are one of his favorite creations...after all he comes back to earth on a horse!
Bless your heart.........you will be in my prayers.
Beverley

"May God put His healing hands upon your breaking heart........"


I agree.  Such a heartbreak for you.  Many of us have been where you are in some way and we all feel your hurt.  May you get some comfort from the knowledge that so many of us care for you, your pain, your loss, and are praying for you.


No doubt in my mind, Cozmo is in heavenly pastures happy and whole.


God Bless you.

Beverley and Connie, thank you for caring and the sweet words. The Lord is going to love Cozmo, and Cozmo will of course love the Lord. I just hope when we get to see each other again he will remember me. My husband asked if we should start looking for another horse (we have Gunner but he is grieving as well) I am just not ready to replace his paddock just yet. Just like the loss of a child (which has happened to me twice; miscarriage and tube pregnancy) it is going to take some time before I am willing to look again. So right now I will keep my mind set on working with Gunner and try my best to heal. Cozmo will never be forgotten but I must think positive and realize he is safe and happy now; and most importantly, no longer in pain. Thanks again you guys, you are angels!!

You're welcome, Carie...you're an angel too...

"You're welcome, Carie...you're an angel too..."  I echo Beverley's words.

SO sorry I missed this!!  []  It breaks my heart for anyone to do have to go through this. 
 
Okay JUST NOW (as I was writing this a guy walked up to my window and started venting, which is fine) I learned the Explosive Ordinance Disposal community over here just lost 2 members with about 5 severely injured.... last week.  []  He had to send one of his team members out to that location to fill in.   I think he said out of the 50 trained EOD people that spooled up to deploy across this part of the world, 5 have been killed. 
 
So everything in perspective... but it doesn't make it any easier.  It is part of animal ownership but some are more painful to lose than others. 
 
Bottom line C&G.... IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.  One of those freak things no one could predict or prevent.  Nobody's fault, and I'm sure Cozmo knew that.  You did what was best for the beloved horse that trusted you to do just that.  Good, but tough job, horse mom! (you're very brave)
 
hugs

Thanks Hunter. God bless everyone who has cared enough to post, you all are some fantastic people and I am glad to be a part of this forum! Your helping me get though this much better then I would have delt with it alone.

Give Gunner hugs from us, too, please.

I'm so sorry for your loss.  Reading your and Beverly's stories brought me to tears. 
 
I still remember when we had to put Percy down.  He had foundered, but he seemed to be healing well until I came home to him rolling in his stall.  He had coliced, and I wasn't there to keep him on his feet.  I got him up but was already too late.   The vet examined him and said there wasn't much that he could do for him. 
Take your time getting a new horse.  When Percy died my trainer was kind enought to loan me one of her horses to keep Charlie company till I was ready.  You'll know when it's time. 
I pray for you and Cozmo, I know he will remember you and be there to greet you in heaven some day.  God Bless...
 

[quote=hunterseat]

Give Gunner hugs from us, too, please.

 
I will give Gunner a hug from you for sure, he needs all the comfort he can get. I actually think he is taken it harder then I am. He will pase his paddock, whinnying, looking around ever since Cozmo got taken away. Its really sad the way he is acting and when he does calm down, he goes and stands right where Cozmo used to stand in the barn. I am clueless at what to do. He paces all day long almost, hardly touches his grain or hay and at night he will just stand and make small noises every once in a while. I really do believe him and Cozmo was the closes horses I have ever had. They loved eachother and I am clueless at what to do to help Gunner cope. They didn't even know eachother just a couple of months and you could already tell they had a strong bond.
 
We actually brought one of my friends geldings over yesterday to comfort Gunner for afew days, till he calmed down. That lasted about a half a day. Bobo is a 4 year old Quarter Horse with the very sweet personality, loves everyone and everything and even so... Gunner wanted nothing to do with him. He would lay his ears back, kick the fence and then continue to pace even more dramaticly looking for Cozmo; so I told her to just take Bobo back home. Only time he does quiet down is when I am in with him to groom him, or talk to him. I have actually even considered camping in the barn with Gunner for afew nights, to give him some company. Not sure it will help but I cant think of anything else to do. My husband thinks I am crazy but what else can I do?

Animals do grieve, but they get over it faster than we do, too. When my husband died, his dog got really sick. I didn't know what I was going to do with the dog. Along with planning the funeral and everything else, I didn't know how I was going to be able to take the dog to the vet and find out what was wrong. It turned out that he was grieving, too.

I, too, have lost (had to put down) a beloved horse. After 30 years, I still miss the horse though not with the sharpness as at first. Time will help both you and Gunner heal. You may still have regrets for the situation but you will come to realize that we can't prevent every bad thing from happening. You will be able to remember the good times with fondness and laughter again. Hugs to you.

Thank you Durango! =)