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things not to say around non-horsey people

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things not to say around non-horsey people
  • Do you like my *** collar?

    His sheath was really dirty, but i cleaned

    In the winter his butt gets very hairy

    Don't jump on him, sit down gently

    what a lovely jackass

    She wants to breed my stud

    theres nothing like 17 hands between your legs

    can i pet your ass

    He had a bad attitude, so we castrated him

    He's got a lot of stamina, oyu can ride him all day long

    is she a maiden?

    i wanted to breed her stud, but he's all booked this season

    can you come down when we do the breeding?

    he is really good at walking and pooping at the same time

    he didnt try to run away when when we drove the nails into him

    he broke his leg, so they shot him

    she bites her baby if it behaves badly

    shes on a new diet, she is only eating grass

    she just got a new rack

    if hes not good, just grab his lip and twist it

    when im done riding him, you can have a turn

    they cut his toe shorter, now he walks better

    if her baby nurses to hard she bites it

    he's much better if you ride him with a crop

    i jumped 4ft high yesterday

    she got a really nice, big, square butt

    what color are her gums?

    the mother is black, the dad is white, the baby came out black with white spots

    don't worry, its normal for his mouth to foam

    all of her babys have been sold overseas

    i know she is gonna have a baby soon, cuz her butt is soft

    her baby started walking 20 minutes after birth

    her body was covered is 4inch lobg hair but i clipped it off

    he has trouble mounting her cuz she is so tall

    she likes to roll in the dirt after her bath

    he has 64 babys

    he goes outside in just a blanket

    he was 6months old when they branded him

    i have to use a stool to mount him

    If he's spilling food on the ground, he might need a dentist

    i was listening to his gut sounds last night

    one testicle is visible, but cant even feel the other one
  • Priceless!  Started my day out with a smile with this one.  Where do you get this stuff Second?  Funny, funny ':)'
  • omg those were hilarious i could just imagine some of the faces of non-horsey people if some of those were said
    very hilarious thanks for sharing!
  • [quote=4myquarter]

    Priceless!  Started my day out with a smile with this one.  Where do you get this stuff Second?  Funny, funny ':)'


    Oh,  I have my sources.  LOL       (cut&amp';p'aste)  emails. etc.
     
    glad you enjoyed.
  • dude!!! those were awesome! you totally put a smile on my face.  And it's so true, normal people would react so differently. LOL
  • [':D']Thank you,   Thank you  (bowing)
  • I loved these!!
  • since I dont have a horse is it bad that I had Dirty thoughts???[':D']
  • [quote=Horseless]

    since I dont have a horse is it bad that I had Dirty thoughts???[':D']

     
    Since when did Not having a horse stop you from having dirty thoughts.  : )   LOL.
     
     
     
    sorry you left yourself open to that one.   LOL
  • [quote=SecondChance]

    [quote=Horseless]

    since I dont have a horse is it bad that I had Dirty thoughts???[':D']


    Since when did Not having a horse stop you from having dirty thoughts.  : )   LOL.



    sorry you left yourself open to that one.   LOL


    True Dat!! you got me on that one!! LOL [8D]
  • Those were really good!  I bet we could think of some more.....
    "If he tries to eat when I'm riding him I slap him on the butt" [':D']
     
    "If you don't tie a string on your thermometer you run the risk of losing it up his butt...."
     
    Okay, why am I thinking of butt lines? [8|]
  • [quote=hunterseat]

    Those were really good!  I bet we could think of some more.....
    "If he tries to eat when I'm riding him I slap him on the butt" [':D']

    "If you don't tie a string on your thermometer you run the risk of losing it up his butt...."

    Okay, why am I thinking of butt lines? [8|]

     
    you must have seen horseless'    new slimmer butt today.    LOL
    he did tone up for that bike ride.
     

     
  • [quote=SecondChance]

    [quote=hunterseat]

    Those were really good!  I bet we could think of some more.....
    "If he tries to eat when I'm riding him I slap him on the butt" [':D']

    "If you don't tie a string on your thermometer you run the risk of losing it up his butt...."

    Okay, why am I thinking of butt lines? [8|]


    you must have seen horseless'    new slimmer butt today.    LOL
    he did tone up for that bike ride.





    I still havent posted my backside in my biker shorts yet. LOL [8D]
  • [quote=Horseless]I still havent posted my backside in my biker shorts yet. LOL [8D]

     
     
    she seen you avatar,  and her imagination  is running wild.   LOL.........
  • Oh, yes!  I spend all my free time hanging out in his work area, waiting for him to get up from his desk chair and walk across the room!